No matter who’s with you, for you, you often have to face Life, and
fight its challenges, alone!
On the Kaun
Banega Crorepati show last evening, host Amitabh Bachchan shared his
personal learning from Life. While at Sherwood College, a residential school in
Nainital, in the 1950s, Bachchan said he had to learn boxing. He explained how
boxing taught him a lot and prepared him to face Life’s challenges. He said: “Inside the
boxing ring you are alone with your opponent. Yes, there are a lot of people
around you, but they are all outside the ring. Many of them will be cheering
for you, many will be cheering for the opponent too. Many will advise you or
have an opinion about you. But no one can play the game for you. Fight you
must, and you will have to fight alone. So it is, as I have discovered, in Life
too. Life’s challenges have to be faced. And at all times you have to remember,
irrespective of who claims to support you or is with you, you are still alone
in your fight!”
I found Bachchan’s analogy very powerful and
relevant. The word “fight” here is not to be viewed in a negative sense. On a
spiritual plane, what I have learned is that there’s no point in fighting or
resisting anything. It only causes suffering. But here, in this context, fight
really means the act of facing Life. Of staying on, doggedly, despite the
circumstances and ploughing on. Sometimes, you will get the feeling that you
are up against a wall. That you are not making any progress. At those times you
will feel defeated and will not be able to make sense of what you must do. People
around you will call you a fool. People will encourage you to give up. At all
such times, if you believe in yourself, and have integrity of purpose, you must
remember that not turning back and running away from your Life situation is “progress”
in a very unique way! In refusing to
budge you are actually moving – perhaps not forward in a physical sense, but
definitely inward and upward in a spiritual sense. These will be lonely
moments, and hours, and days, and weeks, and months, and years….but you must
keep at it, if you believe in whatever you are following!
During these long years of the bankruptcy
that my family and I have been grappling with, I have experienced this feeling
several times. I can visualize myself as that boxer in the ring, taking blow
after blow, unable to roll with the punches at times or even deliver a few at
other times. But I refuse to capitulate or give up. I can’t say exactly why I refuse
to give up. There may be multiple reasons. I believe a lot in myself and the
work we do. My wife and soulmate too shares that belief – so that definitely
helps. And so do my two children. But even then, sometimes, you cannot escape
that feeling of being alone – up against a formidable Life situation! I for
sure do feel guilty at times for taking the decisions I have taken in the past
that have led to what we are having to face now. That’s when the feeling of
being alone is at its peak. Everytime I feel this way though, I quickly direct
my attention to count the blessings in my Life and celebrate the companionship
of my wife and children. It always pulls me out from the depths of darkness and
hopelessness.
I do recognize that many people in Life may
not even have the blessing I have – of a loving, compassionate, understanding
and believing family. And they may find themselves alone – beaten by Life! For
all of you out there who, like me (and my family), are left numbed by Life’s
challenges, here are a few lines to perk you up this Monday morning from
Bachchan’s father, the venerable poet Harivansh Rai Bachchan (1907~2003):
Asaflta
ek chunauti hai, ise sweekar karo,
Kya kami reh gayi, dekho aur sudhar karo.
Jab
tak na safal ho, neend chain ko tyago tum,
Sangharsh ka maidan chhodkar mat bhago tum.
It means:
Failure is a challenge – accept it
Look for what you need to change/improve about yourself/the
situation
Until you succeed (in your endeavor) forget about rest and sleep –
be at it relentlessly
Don’t run away from the challenge
So there may well be times when you may be
alone in Life. Accept it. And Life may well be unreasonable. Face it. Only when
you soldier on – can you get to what you dream of and go where no one else has
ever gone before!
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