Sunny Leone is more spiritual than most people around us

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Spirituality does not impose any conditions on your being. It is the flowering of inner awareness that brings you to be present in whatever is.

Sunny Leone
Picture Courtesy: Internet

There’s this whole song and dance, well we can call it drama too, over Bollywood actor Sunny Leone’s interview with CNN-IBN’s Bhupendra Chaubey. I have not seen any of Sunny Leone’s movies nor have I dug up her footprint, as an erstwhile porn star, online. I have also had no interest in any interview she has given up until now. That’s when my friend BG’s story on the actor and her interview appeared in The Hindu this morning. Now, BG’s someone I respect a lot. And his concluding line, “…Until now, she was a small-time actor, the interview made her a heroine.”…caught my attention. So I googled and pulled up Chaubey’s interview with Leone and watched it. I not only concur with BG’s perspective but I go a step further: I don’t just think Leone is gorgeous-looking, sexy if you will, I believe she’s very, very, spiritual too.

I have no comments to offer on Chaubey’s interviewing style or the quality and tone of his questions. That’s his way of Life. So, my perspective here is not because I disagree with what Chaubey asked or did, but is here because I agree with, and can relate to, everything that Leone said. It takes an evolved person to say that I have no regrets about the past. And Leone does not just say it, she says it with a deep conviction. She says, “ …Everything that I have done in my Life, has led me (in)to this seat…it’s a chain reaction that happens…everything is a stepping stone…when you are young you make decisions that lead you to who you are as an adult…” To me, Leone’s interview offers an unputdownable lesson in spirituality. It left me admiring this young lady for her ability to hold herself up with dignity, when so many people are hell bent on judging her. Watch the full interview here:

I make no comparisons here. But interestingly, at the recently concluded Hindu Lit for Life event, ace photographer Raghu Rai, who was in conversation with renowned art editor Sadanand Menon, said something very similar: “I am just a sum of all the experiences I have been through in Life. Everything that I have done in my Life has made me the person that I am today.” Everyone who heard Rai share with Menon came back feeling reflective and spiritual.

And truly, that’s all there is to Life. We all are a product of the time and the experiences we go through. There’s nothing right or wrong about the choices we make. Each choice leads us to another one and that one leads to yet another. And through choosing, falling, crawling, getting up, flying and falling again, we learn to choose better and cruise along in Life. Leone’s choice of opting to be in the porn industry was not very different from my choice of having been a salesman early on in my career or Rai’s choice of being a news photographer for several years. In the end, really, no experience is a waste and no experience is bad. Each one teaches you something, provided you are willing to learn.

As I see it, there’s a lot I can learn from Leone. She displays humility, acceptance and a keenness to just let things be. For instance, she says that she has neither been “haunted” or “held back” by her past. She tells Chaubey that she does not want to think of a future – of acting with a big star like Aamir Khan – that is not yet born: “At this moment I don’t know (about the future) any better.” I wish, instead of bringing a hypocritical sense of morality into play, that people pause and reflect on Leone’s interview for the honesty she inspires through it. That and her ability to be who she is, celebrating herself, without any regrets of a past that is dead and gone, and without any anxieties over an unborn future, are very spiritual qualities.  To me, those qualities make her more spiritual – and not just sexy – than most people around us are. 

Pray in the buff if you like, who cares? Teri Marzi!

Faith is deeply personal. It is a communion between the Source and you. Nobody and nothing, least of all, religion and law, can come in between you and your faith.

Picture Courtesy: Internet

I was amused reading in the papers this morning that the ruling of the Madurai Bench of the Madras High Court stipulating a dress code for visiting temples in Tamil Nadu has come into effect from yesterday. Obviously the new dress code has evoked mixed responses. The Hindu reports that devotees were “bemused and irritated, stopping just short of being outraged”. I am not surprised. I will not be surprised either if someone challenged this order. I do sincerely hope it is struck down.  To be sure, Justice S.Vaidyanathan, who was concerned “over the use of improper clothes worn by many people visiting temples”, has stipulated that “men should wear a dhoti or pyjama with upper cloth or formal pants and shirts and women should wear a sari or a half-sari or churidhar with upper cloth,’ and for children, ‘any fully-covered dress’.”  So, anyone coming in jeans and/or shorts will be denied entry to temples in Tamil Nadu. Similarly, sleeveless-tops, spaghetti-strapped tops, skirts and mini-skirts are a strict no-no.

Wow!

I was even more amused reading a fellow citizen’s view favoring the new dress code: “If clubs can have dress codes, why not temples?” With due respect to the honorable judge’s ruling and to those favoring this new system, I would like to invite attention to why we must not confound an already complicated situation.

Really, to me, what matters is who you are – not what you wear or how you worship or who you pray to.

Let me tell you a story. The disciples of a venerable Master invited him to visit Benares with them. The Master asked them why they were embarking on the trip. One of the disciples replied, “We want to take a holy dip in the Ganges so that we can cleanse ourselves.” The Master smiled and said he was not keen on the making the trip. He instead gave them a bitter gourd fruit, karela, and asked them to immerse the fruit in the Ganges and bring it back with them. The disciples found the Master’s instruction weird but did not question him. When they returned in a few weeks, they handed back the bitter gourd fruit to their Master. He asked them if it had indeed been immersed in the Ganges. When they said yes it had been, he asked them if it would be tasting sweet now. One of the devotees responded with utter bewilderment, “How can a bitter gourd taste sweet, Master? A bitter gourd is always bitter. How can immersing it in the Ganges change its intrinsic quality?” The Master beamed his big smile and said, “So it is my child. How can you cleanse yourself by merely dipping in the Ganges? You are who you are. Look within and if you don’t like who you are, work on changing yourself. You can’t expect change by merely visiting a temple or taking a dip in a river!”

I relate to this perspective fully. For someone like me, even going to a temple to worship, is a wasted exercise. I feel communion with the Source, the Higher Energy, that has created us and governs this Universe, can happen any time and any place. It saddens me, therefore, that we now have a dress code that dictates how you must show up to worship. But Tamil Nadu is not the first state to have this sartorial idea – some of Kerala’s temples have had, for years now, strict dress codes too. Besides, it is not only Hinduism that’s confused with rituality, division and protocol. Religion as a concept is all messed up. It has become a fear-mongering charade – anyone telling you that God will punish you or that something is a sin wants you to be scared. If you pause to think about it, God has never come forth and said, do this or don’t do this, God has not said be scared of me; yet every religion and every vendor of religious discourse insists on inducing fear. So the truth is that those who peddle religion dogmatically want you to be scared of them. Isn’t it tragic that you cannot celebrate your creation and be one with the Creator, whenever you want, wherever you want; and that you must be fearing rule(s) that religion’s peddlers want you to follow so that they can control you in the name of God?

I must hasten to inform that I am not an atheist. In fact I like Swami Vivekananda’s (1863 ~ 1902) definition of an atheist: “Only the one who does not believe in himself or herself is an atheist.” I am not against religion either. But I refuse to practise religion the way (some) people expect me to practise it. Just like you, I too was created without my choice. Religion was imposed on me too, through family – it is therefore a human act. Whereas, to me, my creation, just as yours, is divine. So, the best way to celebrate the divine in me, is to communion with the Source, the Higher Energy, the way I want to – and when and wherever I want to.

I owe this perspective to Kabir who has written these immortal lines – rendered here beautifully by the legendary Bhupinder – way back in the 15^th Century!

मोको कहाँ ढूंढें बन्दे,

मैं तो तेरे पास में ।

ना तीरथ में ना मूरत में, ना एकांत निवास में ।

ना मंदिर में, ना मस्जिद में, ना काबे कैलाश में ॥

ना मैं जप में, ना मैं तप में, ना मैं व्रत उपास में ।

ना मैं क्रिया क्रम में रहता, ना ही योग संन्यास में ॥

नहीं प्राण में नहीं पिंड में, ना ब्रह्माण्ड आकाश में ।

ना मैं त्रिकुटी भवर में, सब स्वांसो के स्वास में ॥

खोजी होए तुरत मिल जाऊं एक पल की ही तलाश में ।

कहे कबीर सुनो भाई साधो, मैं तो हूँ विशवास में ॥

Translated, it simply means that the Creator, the Source, the Higher Energy, is not in places of worship or in rituals or in penance or in prayer, but is (to be found) within you – in your faith, in what you believe in. So, pray if you must – and for all you care even in the buff in your home – but pray to the Higher Energy within you, the one that keeps you alive and has helped you read, and hopefully internalize this post! J

Enjoy every experience for its own sake – don’t dramatize or intellectualize Life

In this illusory experience called this lifetime, take nothing seriously – including yourself!

I caught up with my cousin after a long, long time. We talked about Life, philosophy and spirituality for a couple of hours. In the course of the conversation, my cousin remarked that Adi Shankara (788 ~ 820 CE) was the greatest philosophers of all time – greater perhaps than Socrates, Plato and Aristotle. My cousin extolled the virtues of the Vivekachudamani, the epic poem that Adi Shankara wrote in 580 verses, to expound his Advaita Vedanta philosophy. I found the conversation with my cousin empowering and enriching. Even so, I came away with a sense of disagreement over anyone wanting to merely pride Indian intellect as being ahead of and above the rest of the world.

Why can’t we enjoy anything – philosophy, experiences, whatever – in Life without comparing, I thought to myself. In fact, a story that Osho often narrated from Adi Shankara’s Life, highlights the same perspective.

Adi Shankara was in Benares. One day, early in the morning – it was still dark because traditionally the Hindu monks take a bath before sunrise – he took a bath. And as he was coming up the steps, a man touched him on purpose, not accidentally, but on purpose, and told him, “Please forgive me. I am a sudra, I am untouchable. I am sorry, but you will have to take another bath to clean yourself.”

Shankara was very angry. He said, “It was not accidental, the way you did that; you did it on purpose. You should be punished in hell.” 

The man said, “When all is illusory, it seems only hell remains real.”

Shankara was taken aback.

The man said, “Before you go for your bath again, you have to answer my few questions. If you don’t answer me, each time you come up after your bath, I will touch you.” 

It was lonely and nobody else was there, so Shankara said, “You seem to be a very strange person. What are your questions?”

He said, “My first question is: Is my body illusory? Is your body illusory? And if two illusions touch each other, what is the problem? Why are you going to take another bath? You are not practicing what you are preaching. How, in an illusory world, can there be a distinction between the untouchable and the brahmin? – the impure and the pure? – when both are illusory, when both are made of the same stuff as dreams are made of? What is the fuss?”

Shankara, who had been conquering great philosophers up until then with his intellect, could not answer this simple man because any answer was going to be against his own philosophy. If he says they are illusory, then there is no point in being angry about it. If he says they are real, then at least he accepts the reality of bodies…but then there is a problem. If human bodies are real, then animal bodies, the bodies of the trees, the bodies of the planets, the stars…then everything is real.

And the man said, “I know you cannot answer this – it will finish your whole philosophy. I’ll ask you another question: I am a sudra, untouchable, impure, but where is my impurity – in my body or in my soul? I have heard you declaring that the soul is absolutely and forever pure, and there is no way to make it impure; so how can there be a distinction between souls? Both are pure, absolutely pure, and there are no degrees of impurity – that somebody is more pure and somebody is less pure. So perhaps it is my soul that has made you impure and you have to take another bath?”

Now, the second question was even more difficult. Shankara had never been in such trouble – actual, practical, in a way, scientific trouble! Rather than arguing about words, the sudra had created a situation in which the great Adi Shankara was check-mated. He gracefully accepted his defeat. And the sudra said, “Then don’t go take another bath. Anyway there is no river, no me, no you; all is a dream. Just go into the temple – that too is a dream – and pray to God. He too is a dream, because he is a projection of a mind which is illusory, and an illusory mind cannot project anything real!”

I find this story beautiful. Unputdownable in fact. I believe the big learning here is this – enjoy everything that you see or experience for it’s own sake. Don’t try to dramatize and intellectualize anything. Least of all Life. My cousin has phenomenal insights into Advaita Vedanta no doubt, but he lost me while making the avoidable comparison.

I don’t think it ever is about who is bigger or who is better or who is richer or who is more beautiful. Everything is what it is. Everyone is who they are. And nothing is permanent. Everything and everyone is transient. So, don’t get caught up in a competition that is meaningless, in running a race which is a non-starter or in ritualizing and intellectualizing Life. Just live – as long as your Life lasts!  

What spirituality really means

Spirituality is not religion. In spirituality there is no God.

Spirituality is about ‘knowing’ what’s going on and accepting it, without resistance. There is only an awakening that results in a sustained awareness. There is no blame possible in spirituality__neither on oneself nor on another. In fact, there's none to take the blame. Spirituality is like a mirror: you look into it, you find yourself. Spirituality is about oneness. The oneness that is visible all around us, of which we are a part. If we care to L.I.S.T.E.N. Interestingly, for that we need to be S.I.L.E.N.T. Both words are made up of the same alphabets. When we listen to creation, while being silent, practicing mouna, we will see, feel and experience the oneness. In that experience, you become awake and aware.

Legend has it that Adi Shankara, the revered Indian Saint, on his way to the Kasi Viswanath temple in Benares, came upon an 'untouchable' (given that Shankara was born in a Namboodiri Brahmin family, he was deemed higher in the social echelon) hunter accompanied by four dogs on the banks of the Ganges.

Overzealous disciples of Shankara tried to influence the hunter to make way for the ‘superior’ Saint. The hunter responded with a query that ‘awakened’ Shankara to the truth of our (human) existence: “Do you wish that I move my everlasting ‘atman’ (the Self, the Soul) or this body made of flesh?” While the legend further talks of an ancillary outcome of Shankara composing five of his famous shlokas known as ‘Manisha Panchakam’ based on this experience with the hunter, the bigger take-away for Shankara must have been__or to any of us reading this story__that all Life is equal.

Spirituality is simply the flowering of this awareness from within. Spirituality is at end of the finish line of the seeking race. When you reach that line, you begin a new journey, of living. Up until that moment, you were just there. Now, you are alive, awake and aware. 

Spirituality is about being who you are

There is no sin. There is no right and no wrong. There's just this one Life and if there's something you want to do, go do it. If there’s someone you love, simply carry on loving! You don't need either societal or religious or legal approval to make a personal choice of loving someone.

There has been a fair amount of debate on whether the US Supreme Court’s ruling allowing gay marriage in all 50 states is religiously tenable or not. There’s also a question being discussed on whether democracies like India will be as accepting of same-sex relationships. Those who are religious are “fearing that being gay is a sin”. And those who are liberal are finding “gay relationships unusual”.

So, here’s a perspective that can perhaps help in clarifying if you would like to consider it. If someone feels more comfortable with someone of the same sex, why does God, religion, law and society have to get involved? To love another aspect of creation is not a crime. What this world needs urgently is global heart-warming. If people loving each other can help that cause, we must celebrate – not admonish, not shun, not ridicule.

And finally, just because you don’t like something, just because you are scared of something, it need not be necessary that others have to feel the same way as you do. You may not appreciate homosexuality – fine! But you have to respect someone’s choice to be homosexual. Spirituality is about being who you are. So, in that context, homosexuals are as human and as spiritual as heterosexuals are!

Living intelligently means to be able to live spiritually

To be spiritual does not mean you must not live well. Spirituality in fact makes no demands on you. There is no need to abstain from anything, no need to propitiate any Gods, no need to observe any rituals and no need to give up anything compulsorily.

Spirituality is the flowering of inner awareness. An awakening that teaches you how to live in this world and yet be above it. This awakening helps you make choices that work for you. You are the decision maker. You are in charge. And so, you can earn money, indulge in comforts, even have a few indulgences in moderation, and yet choose to serve __ touching lives, making a difference. A teacher who taught the world this simple way to live was Guru Nanak, the Sikh saint, who lived and taught between 1469 and 1539. A beautiful story highlights Nanak’s prescription for living intelligently.

Nanak once visited Lahore in present-day Pakistan. A very rich man, Dhuni Chand, invited Nanak to his house. It was a huge bungalow and had seven flags fluttering in the wind outside it. The saint asked Dhuni Chand why he had seven, and only seven, flags outside his house.

Dhuni Chand replied, “They show how much wealth I have. Each flag denotes ten million rupees that I have. So, in all, I have seventy million rupees.”

The Guru observed, "Then you are a very rich man. You must be very happy and contended with yourself?"

Dhuni Chand replied, "Holy Sir, I cannot lie to you. There are some people who are much richer than I am. This makes me sad and I desire to have more wealth. I would like to be the richest man in the city. I cannot feel completely happy and satisfied until my desire is fulfilled."

The Guru said, "But aren't the people who are richer than you also trying to become even more richer? It seems that there is a race between you and them to become the richest in this city. Perhaps, you may not be able to beat them in this race for the most wealth. In that case you may never be happy. Have you ever thought of that?"

Dhuni Chand said, "Holy Sir, I have no time to think such thoughts. I just work day and night to gather more and more wealth"

Guru Nanak smiled and said, "Will you have time to do a small thing for me?"

Dhuni Chand replied, "Most gladly, Holy Sir. What can I do for you?"

The Guru took out a needle, and said, "Please keep this safely with you. Give it to me, when I ask for it, in the next world."

Dhuni Chand took the needle from the Guru. Later, he took this needle to his wife. He gave it to her and said, "The Holy man wants us to keep the needle for him. He will take it back from us in the next world."

The wife was astonished. She said, "Are you mad? How can a needle go to the next world? How can we carry it with us to there? Go back, and return it to the Holy man."

Dhuni Chand went back to the Guru and said, "Holy Sir, please take back your needle. We cannot take this to the next world. We cannot carry it there. That is not possible"

The Guru smiled and said, "Dhuni Chand, this needle is small and light. You say that it cannot go with you to the next world. How can the seventy million rupees go there with you? What good will this wealth do to you there?"

Dhuni Chand realized his vanity and fell at the Guru’s feet and said, "Please Guruji, tell me how my wealth may go with me to the next world."

The Guru said, "Give it to the poor. Feed the hungry. Clothe the poor. Help the needy. When you spend your honestly earned wealth on righteous things, then it will go with you to the next world. Otherwise, it will be plundered here by others."

Dhuni Chand was awakened in that moment. And he soon became one of biggest champions of giving and serving, setting up various institutions in and around Lahore for the welfare of the common folk.

To be sure, there is a Dhuni Chand in each of us – who is amassing, toiling hard without doubt, subconsciously perhaps, beyond our needs, to satiate our wants; who is clinging on to material wealth out of fear and anxiety of losing it. Every once in a while a teacher like Nanak will appear, in the form of a friend, an event, a casual conversation, or a book or story, that will enlighten us. So that the Buddha within us is aroused. So that we may be reminded that while making money is important, putting it to use beyond ourselves is what is more meaningful. This is what, living in this world, and yet being above it truly means. This is the way to live intelligently. 

Adieu Venks: A requiem for my spiritual friend

Being alive is not the big issue. All of us are alive. But few of us live fully and fewer still will be remembered after we are gone!

Venks Venkatachalam

My spiritual friend, and my wife’s father, Venks, passed away this morning. He was a great father, an inspiring teacher and a wonderful human being. He lived a full Life. Most important is that he touched the lives of so many, many people in his lifetime. As the tributes pour in on his passing away, my family and I are overwhelmed. It makes me believe, yet again, that there’s great value in considering how you will be remembered for you to awaken to the opportunity to live intelligently – simply, humbly and usefully. Venks epitomized this spirit.

There were a few lessons that I learned from Venks. In celebration of his Life, let me share them here.

First and foremost was his spirit to serve without expectations, selflessly. To him being useful to others was more important than making something for himself. All his Life he never made any material wealth – no cash assets, no real estate, no jewelry, no stock market investments. But because he groomed so many fine students into good leaders and responsible citizens, his Life was always filled with grace. I never saw him wanting anything. But till the very end, till his last breath, he got all that he needed. Isn’t that a true miracle – always getting whatever you need for 84 years on the trot?

The second lesson I learnt from him was that when your children become adults, you have to let go and be non-interfering. He lived with me and my wife for the last 13 years. Of these 13, 8 were filled with the strife of a bankruptcy in our Firm and abject pennilessness on the personal front for my wife and me. Often there were bailiffs from courts and cops following up on Section (Indian Penal Code) 420 matters, against me and my wife, at our door. Sometimes, I would lose my cool and hop mad trying to take out my frustration – over our hopeless situation – and at other times, I would just want to unwind for a few drinks on my couch. On all these occasions, he would never come up and offer any counsel or state a worry. He would, at the most, ask me: “I hope you can manage all this.” And I would say, “Yes Appa.” He would smile and say in his trademark fashion: “Baba (Swami Sathya Sai) will take care”.

I also learnt from him the value of being disciplined with the palate. He never ate out of turn or more than what he needed. Thanks to him, as a family, we learnt to eat our meals on time. And that has helped us all maintain good health. I think it was Gandhi who once said that if you can conquer your palate, you can learn to overcome any temptation. Venks lived by that credo, led it with example and inspired us to practice it ourselves.

Finally the most important lesson I learned from him was that he simply accepted what came his way. He never resisted the Life that he lived at any stage. In his career as a teacher, he faced so many challenges at work. He never sulked. He never protested. On the personal front too, as a father, as a son, as a brother, he faced several problems. But he never ever became bitter with Life or with anyone. When he was diagnosed with cancer of the prostrate and we finally informed him of his condition, he never panicked. His ailment curtailed his mobility to a great extent. Again, he did not take it badly at all. He simply took it in his stride. Two months ago he went into ICU for a stroke. When he came out and made yet another valiant effort to overcome his debilitating condition, he asked my wife: “Is there something about me that you are not telling me?” His speech was slurred (affected by the stroke) but he was keen to know what it was that had happened to him. He asked so that he could perhaps take it as it came and move on with whatever it was. That was his greatest quality. He desired nothing. And he was content with everything – often with anything!

His family, friends, students – and I – will remember him as a karma yogi. Wiki has this to say of karma yoga: Of the three paths to realization, karma yoga is the process of achieving perfection in action. Karma yoga is said to be the most effective way to progress in spiritual Life. Venks lived that perfect Life of action. He lived in this world and yet he was always above it. To imbue that spirit in me, in my wife and in my children, to me, that will be a true celebration of Venks’ Life!  

Only spirituality can help you live in this world and yet be above it!

Spirituality demands nothing of you. It invites you to just be and to let Life take you on your journey – one moment at a time.  

A whole lot of people out there are confused between spirituality and religion. They think that people who lead religious communities are spiritual. It need not necessarily be so. Spirituality is the flowering of inner awareness – it helps you understand that all Life is equal just as it is impermanent. When you realize the true nature of Life, you simply want to be (who you are) and don’t want to anymore become (something, who you are not!).

This morning’s papers reported the shocking story of a lady reporter having been asked by members of the Jain community to move to the back row in an auditorium because they didn’t want a woman sitting in the front row, when their munis, their gurus, who are celibate, sat on stage. Rashmi Puranik, a journalist with a Marathi news channel, was asked by members of the Shree Santacruz Jain Tapagachh Sangh to move to a back row at a function organized by the Jain community to felicitate Maharashtra Chief Minister Devendra Fadnavis for banning beef in the state. The organizers felt that Puranik’s presence would “offend” the celibates. I found the approach of this section of the Jain community outrageous. I would like them to ponder over how their “venerable” saints, the munis, the gurus, were created on this planet if they found the presence of women “offensive”. The way this Jain Sangh behaved with Puranik is not just regressive in the context of respect to women, it is an assault, a slap, on all of humanity. I am glad Fadnavis said what he finally did at the event, but only after Puranik raised a stink over the treatment meted out to her: “We are in the 21st century. All practices that discriminate against women should be stopped. A society progresses only when women get due respect.” Apparently, the Sangh has issued a statement saying the issue had been misrepresented and that Puranik was only asked to join a row meant exclusively for women. I am sorry. But I find that argument too weak and untenable – aren’t you still discriminating on the basis of gender?

But there’s yet another, equally larger, issue that begs clarity here. Which is, the role of religious leaders. These leaders, like the religions they represent, are confusing humanity. Their avowed rituality, their dogmas and their faulty, often illogical, belief systems are in place only so that they can lead and control their followers. Instead of awakening and inspiring people to the right way of thinking, living, working and winning, they are promoting fear and guilt in the garb of championing religious discipline. I, for one, don’t see any value or virtue in celibacy. In fact, it is impossible for anyone to be celibate. And truly no one is. Indulgence need not be with the physical sense and form alone. Those who claim and profess celibacy in a physical sense may have never stopped fantasizing encounters in their minds! And why work hard on suppressing a natural urge when, by being truly spiritual, you can allow it to arise within you and yet remain unmoved by its presence? A truly awakened person is one who can, in the company and presence of a woman, nurture a feeling of compassion and love for her. Trying to claim the same while asking for women to not cross your path is, to put it bluntly, cowardice.

We met our astrologer, Balan Nair, yesterday. A very learned man. A scholar. He’s truly world-class, a subject matter expert and a no-nonsense, no mumbo-jumbo professional. At 82, he has 64 years of experience in seeing how human beings are tossed around in the ocean of worldly Life – samsara sagaram, according to him! Seeing me wear rings on my fingers some years ago, he had remarked: “Sir, you look educated. Do you think a stone can change your destiny?” That’s how practical and evolved he is – for the record, I internalized his message and chucked my rings! So, my wife and I always find his perspectives enriching. Yesterday, he said this to us (referring to the gut-wrenching experience of a bankruptcy that we are still going through as a family and as a business): “Each numbing experience in Life has a teachable point of view. You will learn as long are you have the willingness to learn – and unlearn. Anybody can go to a forest or sit in a cave and become a sanyasi. But the one who can deal with the pulls and pressures, trials and tribulations, and the continuous churning of the samsara sagaram, of this chaotic world, and yet be above it, that person alone is truly spiritual and a real winner.”

That’s a simple, awakening perspective from someone who has seen a lot of Life. I wish those who sit on powerful social or community pedestals, controlling religions and people, learn from this man’s wisdom. Only then can we create a spiritual world that celebrates all of humanity. Only then can we rid ourselves of a dogmatic, ritualistic religious order that divides basis gender and social stature and exploits the vulnerable among us! 

Being human, not being religious, is the way to finding your God

Stop being humanly religious and instead be religiously human.

Religion, at best, is the path, not the destination. If religion could have helped us find God, all of us, you, me, everyone, should have met God and got Her autograph. Why is it that only few have seen God, fewer have experienced God, only a miniscule have KNOWN God and maybe, just a handful, know that THEY ARE God? That’s because, a large mass of humanity is religious, while a minority is spiritual.

To be sure all religions, and there are over 300 of them globally, champion God-realization. And promise the path to God. Not that they are wrong. But we, the followers, have become so obsessed with the path, not even the journey mind you, that we have come to imagine that being religious IS knowing God. To be religious is to be dogmatic, persistently ritualistic, about a faith. The only faith worth being religious about is being human. Most of humanity, however, while obsessing over religion, has completely forgotten what it means to be human. Take the case of Republican Jon Huntsman, who once was in the race for the Amercian Presidential nomination. A principal__political, not principled__charge against him was that he was raising two adopted daughters from other religions: one a Chinese Buddhist and the other an Indian Hindu. Does it really matter? The color of our skin and the nature of a faith that has been__like our birth__thrust upon us, without our asking for it, without choice to us, is not who we are. We are all human. Period. And we are not divided by race, nationality, faith and such as we imagine it to be. We are all one. Period. All of us have the same 5.5 liters of blood. And it is all red in color. All of us breathe the same Life source. What I exhale you breathe. And what you exhale I breathe. When I can breathe in what you breathe out, and live, why can’t I raise a child that happens to have embraced the same faith as you? If I can, why can’t Jon Huntsman? Huntsman and his wife have seven children, including Gracie Mei, 15, who was abandoned at a Chinese vegetable market at two months of age, and Asha Bharati, now 9, who was left to die on an Indian village dirt road the day she was born. A hands-on dad, Huntsman speaks to Mei in Chinese and is encouraging little Asha to learn about and appreciate her Indian culture and Hinduism. Had Huntsman got his party’s nomination and gone on to win the race to the White House, America would sure have shown the world what it means to be human__not just a Democrat or Republican.

Take also the case of a lady who is seeking an alliance for her daughter ‘within the same faith’, despite hating, from the bottom of her heart, the inhuman rituals of her faith that are perpetrated on girl children__a crude form of female circumcision__because she ‘does not know how people outside her faith are’. What would you call people who claim to be upholders of a faith that indulges in an act of violence against girls, and that too innocent children? We could call them terrorists. Terrorism and terrorists don’t belong to one religion. Anyone who kills humanity, kills Life, in physical or spiritual form, is a terrorist. Isaac Asimov (1920-1992), American sci-fi author, puts it so aptly: “If I were not an atheist, I would believe in a God who would choose to save people on the basis of the totality of their lives and not the pattern of their words. I think he would prefer an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul.”

So true. Let me hasten to clarify that I am neither for atheism nor against religion. I am pleading for us all to just be human. And it begins with each one of us. We don’t have to adopt abandoned children, if we don’t want to, to do this. We don’t have to stop practicing our individual faiths to do this. We just have to stop clinging on to anything that divides us__race, nationality, color or religion. Instead, let’s celebrate being human. And let’s do that without fail, every moment of our lives, from here on__religiously! Believe me, that’s when you will find, just as I have, God!

Surrender to Life and be free!

Surrender to Life. This is the only action required of you. When you surrender, you will be free.

When you are free, you are peaceful. When you are peaceful, bliss follows. With bliss comes abundance. With abundance comes all that you need. When you are in that state, you are radiant.

It’s possible for all of us to be resplendent, radiant like the idol at Tirupati. Those who have been to that temple shrine in southern India will agree that they are speechless, they are thoughtless when in front of the main deity. Many confess they have even forgotten how to pray or what to seek when in the sanctum sanctorum for those few nano-seconds. They speak of divinity and they speak of a super power. They are mesmerized by the glow radiating from the idol, their Lord. They believe it is a superior energy that is embracing them when in proximity of that idol. I don’t wish to challenge their beliefs. But I want to say that you too can radiate that kind of energy. Only if you surrender. Only if you submit yourself to Life’s situations.

All your pain comes from fighting, from resisting Life. All suffering comes from expecting your Life to be different from what it is just now. When you give up the fight and when you stop expecting, you will be at peace. In that state you will be bereft of all wants and yet be abundantly endowed with all that you need. In such a moment, you are one with the Universe, with creation. This is where you begin to radiate the energy that created the Universe. This is not just spiritual thinking. This is metaphysics.

Linji Yixuan, a Buddhist Zen monk, went to his Master and said, “Give me freedom!” The Master said, “Bring yourself. If you are, I will make you free. But if you are not, then how can I make you free? You are already free.”  “And freedom,” his Master said, “really is not the freedom you think of. Really, freedom is freedom from ‘you’. So go and find out where this ‘I’ is, where you are, then come to me. This is meditation. Go and meditate.” So the disciple Linji goes and meditates for weeks and months, and then he goes back to his Master. He tells his Master, “I am not the body. Only this much I have found.” So the Master says, “This much you have become free. Go again. Try to find out.” Then he tries, meditates, and he finds that “I am not my mind, because I can observe my thoughts. So the observer is different from the observed – I am not my mind.” He comes and says, “I am not my mind.” So his Master says, “Now you are three-fourths liberated. Now go again and find out who you are.” So Linji went away thinking, “I am not my body. I am not my mind.” He had read, studied, he was well informed, so he was thinking, “I am not my body, not my mind, so I must be my soul, my atman.” But he meditated, and then he found that there is no atman, no soul, because this atman is nothing but your mental information – just doctrines, words, philosophies. So he came running one day to his Master and said, “Now I am no more!” Then his Master said, “Am I now to teach you the methods for freedom?” Linji said, “I am free because I am no more. There is no one to be in bondage. I am just a wide emptiness, a nothingness.” Osho, recounting this story often, concludes: “Only nothingness can be free. If you are something, you will be in bondage. If you are, you will be in bondage. Only a void, a vacant space, can be free. Then you cannot bind it. Linji came running and said, “I am no more. Nowhere am I to be found.” This is true, real freedom.”

And this freedom comes from surrender. Try it. See what you are enslaved by. And break free. When you realize the nothingness of your creation, the emptiness of your ‘self’, you will be filled with abundance, drenched in a radiant energy. Then you don’t need anything….because you have all that you need, you have freedom! You are free! 

I drink alcohol…and I am spiritual

Just because you don’t like the message, don’t shoot the messenger!  

A couple of days ago I received an email forward of a media release purported to have been issued on behalf of Sri Sri Ravi Shankar and the Art of Living organization. I don’t know if the release was indeed issued on Sri Sri’s behalf. I hope not. The release attacks, albeit in a veiled manner without naming them, director Rajkumar Hirani, actor Aamir Khan and their movie PK, for “projecting sadhus (Hindu saints) in bad light”, for “promoting dargahs (Muslim shrines) and putting down ashrams (Hindu monasteries)” and for “influencing young minds”. The release also says that the makers of PK have been funded by a terrorist to put down spirituality.

I find the content of the media release preposterous. And the charges against Khan, Hirani and PK baseless. Whoever authored that release and whoever authorized its circulation neither understands spirituality not do they understand PK’s message.

Spirituality is the flowering of inner awareness. It is the realization that comes from within that you are the divinity that you seek. Spirituality is deeply personal, it is intense and it is liberating. It sets you free. Religion, on the other hand, tries to achieve the same result but ends up making bad spaghetti out of a good recipe. Not because there’s anything wrong with the recipe. But because the cooks, the high priests of the various religions (as the PK character says in PK, “the managers of the various companies”), have hidden and divisive agendas; they promote ritualism and hold gullible people – like you and me – hostage! In the movie, in one brilliant scene, PK picks up a new born baby to inspect if the baby is born with a “stamp”, a means of identification, that he or she was actually created (“sent down”) to be a Hindu or a Christian or a Muslim. The message is stark and uncomfortable: that our religion has been thrust upon us. We are born free to simply be human. But the label of Hindu, Muslim, Christian, Sikh, Jew and such is stuck on us as an afterthought. Our family and society force us to follow the religion that they have chosen for us. To add to the confusion, people who are self-proclaimed leaders of the various religions, induce fear among their followers saying that if you question what is being told and practiced, you will be punished by your God! PK makes another important, uncontestable point – the God, he says, that created you and me, is different from the God that we humans have created to suit our convenience. God, the creator, is compassionate, loving and is ever present – within us. The God we have created, he says, is forever elusive, being “managed and protected by agents and managers” and making people fearful. The truth is where there is fear, there is no faith. And when there is faith, there can be no fear. Faith is like light and fear is like darkness. You can bring light to drive away darkness. But you cannot bring darkness into a room which is well lit. You cannot, therefore, claim you have faith in a God, your God, and yet be fearful of either God or Life or both!!

The media release makes one other ridiculous, erroneous point. It states that people who consume alcohol are not spiritual! Spirituality is totally unconditional. Being spiritual means just being. You can be whoever you are. You don’t have to abstain from anything, you don’t have to fear anyone, you don’t have to fast, you don’t have to pray and you don’t have to follow any rituals. You just have to be who you are and enjoy being who you are. Spiritually empowered people employ this freedom, this fearlessness, this faith – that they will be taken care of and provided for by the Universe – to live in bliss. To them nothing is a sin. And nothing is forced. They live simply – seeing the divinity in themselves and in everyone and everything around them.

I seriously hope Sri Sri’s ashram did not issue that release and that the mail I received was just one of those hoax forwards. If it was indeed a genuine communication, I pity those who put it out – for they are missing PK’s central message and shooting the messenger, Aamir, just because he’s seen, per worldly definition, as a Muslim.  PK is not about Hindus and Muslims. It is not about Hindu Gods and a Muslim God or a Christian God. It is about you and me and how we are allowing ourselves to be trapped in the vicious cycle of religion, rituals, godmen and fear. Watch PK if you can and care. And even if you don’t want to watch it, raise a toast when you drink tonight!! To Christmas, good health and happiness. My toast, however, is to the authors of that redoubtable release: “Hey, I drink alcohol…and I am spiritual”!   

Spirituality means to live free and live in a let-go!

Nothing is difficult. Nothing is easy. As long as you are willing to experience anything, you will make progress on the spiritual path.

I have often heard people say that spiritual concepts are easy to preach, easier to understand yet they are downright difficult to practice in the real world. The reference here is to practising forgiveness, compassion, detachment and letting go of emotions such as fear, worry, insecurity, anxiety, hatred, grief, suffering and anger. I live in the real world. And I too am challenged by everyday situations where I have to grapple with these emotions. But my awareness helps me immensely. Which is why understanding spirituality is important to make progress on the path.

Spirituality is the flowering of inner awareness. It is to know that you came with nothing and will go with nothing. This understanding will help you stay detached. As the Bhagavad Gita says, spirituality will help you to, “live in this world, yet be above it”! Spirituality is not religion. It is not ritualistic, it calls for no abstinence and it does not hold you hostage to isms and preachings. On the other hand, it sets you free, it is personal and it is awakening!

Spirituality opens the doors to experiencing Life as it is, for what it is. Life is nothing but a string of experiences – of love, loss, companionship, separation, pain, joy, success, failure, betrayal, trust, compassion…the list can be endless. Living really means to experience each moment with the curiosity of a child and the spirit of an adventurer. The reason why we find it difficult to accept a spiritual perspective to living, which is living with this awareness, this understanding, is because we connect everything in Life to a material – and therefore impermanent – sense of security! All our fears, insecurities and worries are connected in some form or the other to money or to health or to relationships – all of which are impermanent and perishable. Which is why we say it is difficult to stay detached. Actually, detaching per se is easy. What scares us is what will happen when we become detached. So the idea of living without money is easy and simple. But the fear of living without money consumes us. And so we cling on to that fear and suffer. So it is with messy relationships. And with health situations that are beyond our control. As long as we cling on to something it will torment us. Spirituality means to live free and live in a let-go!  

Now, doing all of this, which is living on the spiritual path, and making progress, is not easy. Yet it is not difficult too. Just learn to be willing to experience anything that comes your way – absolutely anything. If you have to forgive someone – be willing to experience the struggle that forgiving involves and also the bliss that it can deliver! If you have to let go of fear, be willing to face whatever scares you, look it in the eye and be also willing to awaken to the realization that everything that you are scared of losing – including your own Life – is impermanent in any case! This is how you walk on the spiritual path. One experience at a time. One moment at a time. Living and loving each moment as you go along!

Letting inner awareness bloom amidst all the imperfection

If there indeed is a Higher Energy, a Creator, why is that Energy partial? Why is it that we see so much imbalance in the way in which peace, happiness, health and wealth are distributed in the world? Why is Life so unfair to most people at most times? Why is Life so imperfect?

The answer to all these questions lies in accepting Life, the reality, as it is and understanding the purpose of Life itself. To be sure, we are created on this planet to understand the value of this Life, this lifetime. We are incarnated as human beings to be able to distinguish between right and wrong, good and bad, happiness and sorrow. To serve before we deserve or seek 'deservance'. Each moment has been designed for our personal learning, evolution and growth. If we see pain and suffering around us, we must see an opportunity to both be grateful for the blessings in our lives and to work for alleviating that suffering to the extent possible by us. Each event or encounter is inviting us to either soak ourselves in gratitude for what we have or to serve another. Each challenge placed in front of us is again an invitation to discover the indomitable spirit in us. To realize the 'Self', the soul, that is immortal. As long as we keep questioning why things are the way they are and keep doubting Life’s intellect and integrity, we will remain stuck and experience stagnancy. We will be embittered and embattled. The moment we awaken to the reality that 'it is what it is' , we will discover that 'our sense of gratitude’ and 'our spirit to serve' are inspiring us to live our lives meaningfully. We will then find abundance and joy in everything we see and do.

Spirituality is simply the flowering of this inner awareness. And what helps this flower bloom within is acceptance of what is, including the imperfection that surrounds us, than pining for what is not!

Choicelessness is a blessing that leads you to bliss!

If you have no choice in Life, it is a good thing. Then you can just be, with what is!

The other day I was delivering a Talk to a group of young managers. I spoke to them about learning to be happy and content while living with whatever circumstances Life has placed you in. The Talk was autobiographical in parts as I shared anecdotes and learnings from my Life to illustrate how I had made the transition from running the rat race and earning-a-living to simply living – accepting whatever Life offered me. One of the managers, in his late 20s, observed that perhaps I had lost the “aggression” in me because of the experiences I had been through in Life. He said: “Maybe because you were left with no more choices, because Life dealt with you ‘unfairly’, you had to accept whatever came your way.”

Interesting point the young man made. What do you do when you don’t have a choice but to accept whatever Life offers you? Simple. You learn to live with what is there, whatever is available, and through this acceptance, you are happy and peaceful. Well, in reality, there are no choices. Our education, our intelligence, makes us believe that we have a choice over what Life offers us, over the way Life deals with us. So we keep on resisting or avoiding the Life which is happening to us. In doing all this, we end up suffering. What causes us misery is not what is but our wish that it wasn’t there in the first place.

Spirituality is not about religion. It is about the flowering of inner awareness in you – the one that tells you that it is what it is. And that you will do well to accept what is. So, over time, and from experience, all of us evolve. Some of us evolve through a crisis. Some of us evolve through resisting, fighting, avoiding and then learning to accept Life. Some of us evolve by understanding the scriptures and applying our learnings to real-Life contexts. Each of us evolves though for sure – at our own pace and time. The evolved person does not ever say no to Life! He or she is never looking for choices. Sadness comes and it is accepted. Tragedy comes and it is accepted. Opportunity comes and it is accepted. A moment to celebrate comes and it is accepted. This person does not impose conditions on Life. And therefore this person is happy and content despite the circumstances he or she is placed in.

It is only by being happy and content with the Life you have that you can anchor in inner peace. And, to that end, having no choice in Life, whatever be the context, is a great blessing. A blessing that leads you to bliss!