If worry could solve even one percent of the
problems that we face daily, worrying may be perfectly justified as a global
pastime. Yet while it is evident that a large mass of humanity worries most of
its lifetime away, there is no evidence to suggest that worrying has been productive
at all.
Worrying causes frustration and plunges you
into a depressive spiral. Everything and everyone seems to be getting after
you. One thing leads to another. And by the end of a destructive spell of
worrying you are dealing with more crises than you originally had started off
dealing with. Worrying comes free so everyone does that. But remember the problems
it seeds are very, very expensive!
A business acquaintance, by sheer accident, introduced
me to this learning. Several years ago, I was in Bengaluru on work. And I was
running late for a meeting. The one I had just finished had ended badly. The
client owed my Firm a substantial sum of money. We had been following up on our
claim for over a year. We had been promised a resolution and payment at that
meeting. But the client reneged, disputed the claim and refused to make any
payment that day. The meeting ended sourly and in a stalemate. I was both angry
and worried as I rode in the car for the next meeting. I was angry because what
the client had done was unfair and unethical. I was worried because I had
issued cheques to parties, who were long overdue for payment by us, in
anticipation of this inflow. I did not know what I should do. In such time, I
reached the venue of the next meeting. It was a large company. And they were
prospecting my Firm for a potential service contract. I was late. So, I tried
to rush the security guard at the registration desk. He didn’t seem to bother.
I yelled at him. When I finally reached the reception area, I found the
receptionist speaking on the phone. It appeared to me in a few minutes that she
was on a personal call. I gestured to her that I was late for a meeting. She
impatiently gestured back asking me to be seated. I scowled at her.
And the chatter in my mind went: “Damn!
Why is everyone after me today? How am I supposed to pay off those vendors and meet
the wage bill of my team with this inflow not coming through? I am now late for
this meeting. And I am not likely to be making an impression with my
presentation with this new prospect because I am both late and in a lousy frame
of mind! Damn!”
Finally, I was ushered into an empty
conference room. I hooked up my laptop and tested my slide deck on the screen.
An executive in formal attire walked in. I did not look up at him. I wanted to
avoid any polite conversation. I just wanted to present my Firm’s case and go
back, perhaps, to worrying. The fire in my cash-flow was far more demanding of
my attention than a potential business deal. I assumed the man was one of the
members of the leadership team to whom I was to present that day. After setting
up my deck, I looked away from the man. It didn’t occur to me that I was
behaving like an oaf. I was consumed by my desire to drown in the seductive, ruinous
comfort of my worry! I paced up and down the side of the conference room that I
had occupied. The executive must have felt it bizarre that his guest was not
even acknowledging his presence in his own office!
After what must have been several moments of
silent gazing by him and a pretentious meditative pacing by me, he spoke up.
He asked me, in a cold, matter-of-fact,
tone: “AVIS, do you always look so beaten, morose and wear this frown all the
time?”
It appeared that a million-volt thunderbolt
had hit me. I froze in my tracks. I turned around. Looked at the executive and
sheepishly said: “Errr….Well…..I am sorry….I was preoccupied….Errrr….!”
He was in his mid-40s then and I was in my
mid-30s. He appeared to be a nice bloke. He smiled and spoke calmly: “I can see
that you are worried about something. And angry too with something. If you make
this presentation carrying those two emotions, let me tell you, you will piss
off everyone. I am already wondering why I am here when you are not here!”
I apologized. I thanked him. I walked across
to his side. We exchanged business cards. I discovered he was the Head of
Strategy and awarding my Firm the mandate, should we make the cut, was in his
hands, apart from the CEO’s. I knew the CEO well. And that’s why I was there. I
pulled myself from the brink that day, thanks to this gentleman’s unsolicited
yet fortuitous intervention. The presentation went very, very well. And we
bagged the contract!
But more than that, the value of the wisdom this
man has imparted in me is priceless. He taught me, in a nano-second, how
worrying can ruin a perfect moment pregnant with opportunity! He taught me the
power of now! It took me several years of struggle, tears, pain and suffering,
to internalize this learning. But if he had not sowed that seed that day, I
would not have been able to tame the worry beast in my Life!
 |
| Bob Marley 1945-1981 |
I was reminded of this episode this morning
as I read a story in the latest issue of OPEN magazine on Rohan Marley, the
legendary Jamaican reggae singer, and Rastafarian, Bob Marley (1945-1981).
Rohan, now 40, told OPEN that his father had taught all his many siblings to
not just enjoy Life but to “fulljoy” it!
Think about it. How much of your precious
living moments are you sacrificing on the altar of worry daily? How much of
your time do you look beaten, morose and are wearing a frown__like I did that
day in the conference room in Bengaluru? Don’t you want to “fulljoy” Life? If you do, then know that to “fulljoy” Life
means to not worry and be happy! Because, when you worry, as Bob Marley
famously and beautifully sang (“fulljoy” this song, clinging on to its every
lyric…. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIM3GHvBQjY),
you only double your troubles!
No comments:
Post a Comment