The world can only be made better
by giving and forgiving.
I rediscovered the meaning in practicing
this truism again this morning. On the street I saw an old lady stumble and
fall on the pavement. She was struggling with the weight of several bags that
she was carrying. It was a busy morning. I was rushing off to catch up on work.
But I flagged down an auto-rickshaw and requested the driver to pick up the
lady from across the road and take her to where she would have liked to go. I gave
the driver some money and asked him to call me if he had to go a longer distance
and pick up any extra cash from me later in the day or tomorrow. The driver,
who belongs to the redoubtable, unreasonable and unruly clan of auto-rickshaw
drivers that terrorize public transport in India, replied: “Sir, thanks for
giving me the opportunity to serve. I will take care of her, wherever she
wishes to go. I will make up the difference in fare, if any!” As she rode away
in the auto-rickshaw, a strange sense of peace and joy rose within me. I had
had a pretty rough morning and much of it was centered around what we didn’t
have and magnified by one individual on my team who was making Life miserable
for all of us. Yet this one opportunity to serve, in a sublime and sure
fashion, made me feel infinitely better. Re-energized and feeling good that I had
been useful, despite my circumstances that had made me momentarily bitter with
my Life and world, I forgave my colleague for his transgressions. I realized
that if I had to behave the same way as he was doing, it would leave both of us
scarred. I resolved to give the situation my understanding. It may not change
anything in the short term but definitely makes me feel good and useful as I
write this.
Try this approach to give and to
forgive. I guarantee that you will feel the same way as I do.
When things get snatched away from
you and when you feel betrayed, let down, hurt and pained, the natural response
is to protect what’s left with you and to be wary of everything and everyone.
But such a restrained existence will only make you hurt more.
The first sense of insecurity in us
comes from whether we have enough for our own survival. So it is not that we
don’t want to give. We do. But what prevents us from giving freely is the fear that
what if we needed what we are giving away and we don’t have enough of it! The
truth is we will always have enough and be provided whatever we need by the
Universe. To be sure, we will never be denied our own needs. So, give and give
freely. Without inhibitions and without expectations.
Forgiving too involves giving of a
different kind - your understanding, patience and love. If you understand that
we are all the product of the time we go through, you will realize that people
behave differently from you because of what they are suffering from and going
through. If someone is causing you pain,
you are perhaps inclined to believe that they are conspiring against you. And
your reflex action is to hate them. To want to have nothing to do with them.
But if you make a sincere effort, you will realize that their behavior is an
expression of the anguish within them. What they need is your understanding,
and not your hatred. Forgiving does not mean subscribing to someone’s
despicable behavior or forgetting what happened. It means just letting go of
all the negative energy that may be pent up within you, by giving the person in
question your understanding and being compassionate.
When you give and forgive, especially
when you are not expected to, you may well not be recognized or celebrated. But
you will discover the joy of being human. Isn’t that a celebration enough in
itself?
No comments:
Post a Comment