Sometimes, it is best not to get
what you want in Life. Because when you review the reasons why you did not get
what you wanted, you will really find what is truly ordained for you.
Life is inscrutable. The path you
choose may not always be available to you. But a closed door or a dead end will,
ALWAYS, often miraculously, open up a whole new path for you. You may trudge on
it reluctantly to arrive at an unknown place, only to discover that you really,
truly belong there!
This is so bizarre at one level.
You are encouraged to set a Vision for yourself, have goals and diligently
pursue them. Yet you are now being told that despite what you have planned,
Life will take you on its own course! Well, it may seem incredible, but it is
the way it is. At another level, it is so simple and easy. You can only make a
Life out of what happens to you __ irrespective of what you planned or wanted.
That’s really the only way to bliss!
16-and-a-half years ago, in 1996,
after three successive disastrous employment stints, I presented myself in the
office of a high-profile recruiter in Chennai. He subsequently built his
company up well and sold it recently to a global recruitment firm. But back
then, the recruiter was a big name, and his firm was still a start-up. I had
known him through my years as a business journalist. So, I sought his help in
getting me a good, well-paying, purposeful corporate job. He spent three hours
speaking with me and assured me of a quick turnaround. Post that meeting, over
the next three months, I must have called him a few dozen times. Email was not
so big then. So, one had to follow up only via phone. He neither answered my
calls nor he did return even one of them. It was bizarre. I remember agonizing
then: at least he could tell me why he was not successful in pushing my case
with employers?
Frustrated, and perhaps also driven
by the fact that I had been ‘rejected’, I resolved that I should perhaps go on
to be an employer. And not be an employee anymore. One fine day, in August
1996, I went ahead and set up a tiny consulting Firm with my wife! We were moderately
successful financially in our early years. But by the end of our first decade
in business, we were staring at a big, dark,
black hole of accumulated losses
and an unimaginable pile of debt. Eventually, we went bankrupt and, in many
ways, continue to be in that state.
Initially, I hated where we had ended
up finding ourselves: presiding over the debris of a debt-laden, problem-ridden
firm. I used to hate that feeling__of guilt, ignominy, hopelessness, fear and
resentment__ which would gnaw at me from within in each waking moment. But now,
after all these years, when I look back, I find that without the rejection I
faced in the job market, I may not have embraced entrepreneurship and without
having failed at entrepreneurship, I may never have understood what Life is,
what intelligent living is and understood what contentment is as I do now!
When I introspect, I am grateful for the
experiences I have been through that have transformed me from being an angry,
foul-mouthed, obsessive, possessive, egotist to being a simple, accepting, mindful
voyager through Life. My learnings from the path that I did not choose, but
which unfolded itself in front of me as I walked, have brought me to, I
earnestly believe, my Life’s purpose: to awaken people to the right way of
thinking, living, working and winning! I am reminded of what John Bunyan, a 17th
Century English writer and preacher, had to say: “Although I have been through
all that I have, I do not regret the many hardships I met, because it was they
who brought me to the place I wished to reach.”
So celebrate Life’s inscrutability. Don’t
grieve, don’t mourn over what you wanted and did not get. Keep walking, knowing
that the path will always unfold, and always take you to where you must eventually
arrive and truly belong!
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