As long as you accept what comes your way, you will be
always at peace with and in Life!
Last evening, we were at a pre-wedding
reception of a good friend. It was a well-choreographed evening of music and
dance. And, of course, drinks and some exquisite gourmet food. As the evening progressed
and the Manganiyars from Rajasthan took the audience on a spiritual high with
some soul-stirring Sufi music, the bar ran out of wine. What had been on offer
was red wine from Australia and California, white wine from Italy, and domestic
beer. It appeared that the people managing the bar had wrongly estimated the
inventory required for the evening. For some time, there was chaos at the bar
counter. But the guests, obviously, given the occasion, did not make this inadvertent
aberration a big issue. Soon, the bar started serving some cheap red and white
wine and everyone seemed to either be content with the new order or switched to
beer. The evening went on and climaxed with some spirited dancing by the guests
and a high-octane rendition of “Dama-dam
Mast Kalandhar…” and “Nimbooda…Nimbooda…”
(Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam, 1999, Sanjay
Leela Bhansali) by the Manganiyars.
I was reminded of a quote of Epictetus (55 AD ~
135 AD), the Greek sage and Stoic philosopher: “Remember that in Life you must
behave as at a banquet. Is anything brought round to you? Put out your hand,
and take a moderate share. Does it pass you? Do not stop it. Is it not come
yet? Do not yearn in desire towards it, but wait till it reaches you.”
If you observe Life closely, all the suffering
around you, or even in you, comes from your wants. In expecting people,
situations and things to be different from the way they are, you invite misery
to yourself. Obviously the managers at the hotel, where last evening’s
reception, was held had goofed up. Or perhaps there was a miscommunication, or
a mis-estimation, of the required inventory between the hosts and the hotel’s
staff. Now what can be done about it? I am sure some of the people from among
the hosts will do a post-mortem and maybe the hotel’s management will review it
as well. But what control does a guest, like me, have on the way the bar was
managed? I just shrugged my shoulders, picked up some domestic beer, and was
lost in the music.
This is precisely the way to deal with
everything and everyone in Life. You – and I – have no control on what happens
to us. There is no point in complicating your Life by demanding that people and
events be in a certain way. The fact is that everything is the way it is. What
is, is your reality. Your wishing it to be different cannot change the reality,
cannot change what is. So, every time your mind agitates, every time you pine
for something to be different, remember Epictetus. Just accept
what comes and let things, people, events and situations, simply be! Happiness
and inner peace are intended and assured outcomes!
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