If you
want to understand the value of Life, spend an hour outside the Intensive Care
Unit (ICU) of a hospital. You will get it!
My father-in-law
went into ICU a couple of days ago. Standing outside the ICU, waiting for our
turn to visit him, my thoughts went to the other families who, like us, had
gathered there to visit their dear ones. Everyone was prayerful, hopeful,
worried and anxious – all at the same time. Once inside, when I saw my father-in-law,
I once again realized how Life, over time, changes everything – and everyone. My
father-in-law is the simplest soul you will find on the planet. A scholar, a
teacher, an embodiment of ethics and discipline, a nature lover and a rock
climber in his younger days. He had been “fit as a fiddle” (as he would often
joke) until just a few years back. But yesterday, he was looking so frail and
completely at the mercy of Life – he had suffered a mild stroke that has
impaired his speech totally; so he was struggling to even communicate with us.
When I came out of the ICU, I couldn’t miss the significance of my realization:
“The human body cannot go on forever. Whoever you are, you will be physically
felled one day. So, the best way to live is to live each day fully and humbly,
doing what you believe in and while being compassionate to everyone around you.”
My father-in-law has lived Life this way for all of his 84 years.
Most of us, unfortunately, miss this
learning and so, fail to awaken to this realization. We go on wanting to
control our lives and those of others around us. We are so full of ourselves –
our opinions, our successes and our wants. Earlier this past week, I had a
participant at a change-management workshop I was leading who was constantly disrupting
the proceedings trying to flaunt her opinions and knowledge. She was
continuously choosing to differ with my choice of words or with the examples I
was using to explain concepts and ideas. For instance, when I was explaining
Purpose (of creation) in the context of people and organizations, she kept arguing
that the word ‘calling’ was better suited for individuals. “People have a
calling, organizations have a Purpose,” she insisted. I told her that she had a
point but since Purpose was universally accepted and chosen as a more powerful
and “deeper” word to explain “reason for creation/existence – raison d’etre), we will stay with it.
But the lady kept on harping on her point. Finally, in an attempt to invite the
lady to have an “open” mind, I had to demonstrate the famous “tea cup” story
from Zen Buddhism. Nan-in, a Japanese Master during the Meiji era (1868 ~ 1912),
received a university professor who came to “learn” more about Zen – “I want to
educate myself. I want to know more about this philosophy. Teach me what it is
all about as quickly as you can, so that I can go back and demonstrate my
new-found knowledge to all those who look up to me.” Nan-in served tea. He
poured his visitor's cup to the brim, and then kept on pouring the tea. The
professor watched the cup overflow until he could no longer restrain himself.
“The cup, dear Master, is overfull. No more tea will go in!” Nan-in smiled.
“Like this cup," Nan-in said, “you are full of your own opinions. How can
I teach you Zen unless you first empty your cup?”
Most of us are like the lady at my workshop
and the professor in Nan-in’s story. The lady and the professor represent how
full we can sometimes be; how our view of our inflated self-worth blinds us and
how we fail to understand that be pompous about anything – wealth, health,
knowledge, relationships, the body – is so much in vain. Ultimately, this most
powerful vehicle that makes our human existence experience a lifetime – the
body – will be felled with wear and tear. And without the vehicle being able, our
journey here, on the planet, begins to sputter.
Some day soon, each of us will have to realize
that Life is a limited period offer. That you cannot undo what you have done.
You cannot go back to relive your Life. That you cannot rewind Life. So, if you
really can’t control the withering away of your body, if you cannot control the
progress of Life from birth to death, why are you imagining that you are in
control? Why kid yourself that you call the shots in your Life? Why this ego,
why this vanity, why this high-drama that you are superior to the others around
you?
I walked back home from the hospital last
evening deep in thought. I realized, yet again, that we did not ever control
anything, we control nothing and can never hope to control anything in the
future either. Everything that is, everything that we vainly believe is ours,
will soon be felled, will wither away and will end – including this body and
this lifetime. The only time you and I have to live is now. Live each moment,
therefore, fully and happily. For the Life and the
moment that has once been lived can never be rewound!
Excellent Avis
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